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31,55523/12/2014

He has a lot of problems and feels jealous of others

Question: 216830

I have a whole range of personal issues: from a low self-esteem to constant guilt over certain decisions that I can’t go back and change. Whenever I see happy Muslims, especially couples, I feel a sense of bitterness and envy, and would blame myself for being unable to have what they’ve got. One of my uncles told me these feelings are from the jinn and that I should seek ruqyah, but I worry that if I blame the jinn I’m just seeking a scapegoat over clearly psychological issues. What should I do?

Answer

Praise be to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon the Messenger of Allah and his family.

Firstly: 

We are happy to find among Muslims such excellent awareness of their psychological or mental problems. You have done well not to blame these problems on the jinn, because many people go to extremes in that, and every time something happens to one of them he says that it is because of the jinn, even though Allah, may He be glorified and exalted, has set boundaries for their realm which cannot be crossed except if Allah wills, and He has appointed for people guardians from among the angels who protect them from evil. Allah, may He be glorified and exalted, says (interpretation of the meaning):

For each one are successive [angels] before and behind him who protect him by the decree of Allah. (ar-Ra‘d 13:11) 

Al-Hafiz Ibn Katheer (may Allah have mercy on him) said: 

That is, each person has angels who come to him in succession, guarding him by night and by day, protecting him against bad things and accidents, just as other angels come to him in succession to record his deeds, both good and bad, angels who come by night and by day. So there are two angels on the right and left who record his deeds, and two other angels who protect him and guard him, one behind him and another in front of him. So he is surrounded by four angels by day and four others by night, two guarding him and two recording his deeds.End quote from Tafseer al-Quran and ‘Azeem (4/437) 

The Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said to his paternal cousin ‘Abdullah ibn ‘Abbas (may Allah be pleased with him): “Be mindful of Allah, and He will protect you.” Narrated by al-Bukhari (2516) 

So it is not permissible for anyone to blame the jinn for everything that happens to him, so as to make himself free of error or shortcoming, for Allah, may He be exalted, has told us that everything that befalls the individual is because of his own sins and disobedience towards Allah. Good and bad alike are decreed by Allah, may He be exalted, but Allah has decreed it and has decreed its causes along with it, such as obedience or disobedience to Him. Allah, may He be exalted, says (interpretation of the meaning):

And whatever strikes you of disaster – it is for what your hands have earned; but He pardons much. (ash-Shoora 42:30)

Corruption has appeared throughout the land and sea by [reason of] what the hands of people have earned so He may let them taste part of [the consequence of] what they have done that perhaps they will return [to righteousness]. (ar-Room 30:41).

This has to do with bad things and misfortune. 

With regard to good things and happiness, Allah, may He be exalted, says (interpretation of the meaning):

Whoever does righteousness, whether male or female, while he is a believer – We will surely cause him to live a good life, and We will surely give them their reward [in the Hereafter] according to the best of what they used to do. (an-Nahl 16:97)

{And whoever fears Allah – He will make for him a way out

And will provide for him from where he does not expect. And whoever relies upon Allah – then He is sufficient for him. Indeed, Allah will accomplish His purpose. Allah has already set for everything a [decreed] extent.} [al-Talaq 65:2-3].

 So whoever wants a happy, tranquil, good life, and wants things to be made easy for him and to get out of every crisis and problem that he is faced with, has to believe, do righteous deeds and fear Allah. Otherwise, he will never find happiness or peace of mind. 

But whoever indulges in disobedience to Allah and going against His commands has chosen misery for himself, and if anything happens to him after that, he has no one to blame but himself. 

It is not wise to fall short in taking measures that will lead to happiness, then spend your time lamenting your situation and the misery you are going through. 

You have to mend your relationship with Allah, may He be exalted, first of all. Then after that, Allah will set straight all your affairs. 

On our website we have presented a number of ideas and suggestions that will help to build confidence and overcome difficulties and crises. Please see no. 83962, 113465, 194318 and 212179

We have also mentioned some advice for healing from the disease of envy in the heart. Please see the answer to question no. 12205. We ask Allah, may He be exalted, to set your affairs straight and to enable you to do that which He loves and is pleased with. 

And Allah knows best.

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